Choosing the right name for your baby is high stakes stuff. And parents don’t always get it right. Let’s never forget that George Foreman decided to name his five sons George Jr, George III, George IV, George V, and George VI.
esterday, reality TV star and billionaire Kylie Jenner and Travis Scott announced a baby name retraction.
Kylie and Travis welcomed their second child into the world at the start of February. A week after the birth they shared the baby’s name on Instagram. “WOLF WEBSTER’ Kylie posted alongside a white love heart emoji.
But it appears in the intervening weeks, there has been something of a sea change in the Jenner-Scott household. And Kylie has now told her followers their son no longer goes by the name Wolf.
“FYI our son’s name isn’t Wolf anymore,” she said. “We just really didn’t feel like it was him. Just wanted to share because I keep seeing Wolf everywhere.”
She’s not the first celebrity to change her child’s name. Amy Schumer changed her son’s name from Gene Attell to Gene David after realising the former sounded a little crude. While Grey’s Anatomy star Caterina Scorsone decided to use her daughter’s middle name (Lucinda) instead of her Lord of the Rings inspired first name Arwen.
Baby name remorse is more commonplace than you may think. In 2019, a report showed that one in seven parents in the UK regret the name they had given their child.
A growing number of Baby Names Consultants now offer to alleviate pressure and help parents find the perfect fit for their child by going through family history, studying naming trends and delving into literature.
In the States, there is even a trend of giving your child a place-holder name and then letting them decide what they want to be called when they grow up.
While parents may secretly question their baby name choices, officially changing your child’s name is more unusual.
But for some parents, it’s non-negotiable. Mum-of-three Zara Lawford, from Rathfarnham inb Dublin, decided to change her youngest daughter’s name four months after she was born.
In the lead-up to the birth of her third child, Zara and her husband Peter had been in disagreement over names.
“We had very different opinions,” she says.
Zara liked Charlotte and Annabelle, but Peter wasn’t a fan of the nickname Charlie, and a recent horror film called Annabelle made him wary of the latter.
As this was their third child, and they couldn’t agree on a name, Zara and Peter decided to start thinking outside the box. They began to consider what they believed were more unusual options.
“We thought, ‘Let’s go a little bit out there, a bit quirky’,” she says. The couple ‘half decided’ on the name Brooke — which means small stream.
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Travis Scott and Kylie Jenner changed their baby’s name from Wolf
In the hours after their daughter was born, Zara was in an oxytocin haze and filled to the brim with love. She turned to Peter and told him to send out a text to friends and family telling them the baby had arrived safely, and letting them know what her name was.
She told Peter he could make the final call. “I said, ‘You just pick. It’s fine, I am so in love with the world right now it doesn’t matter. You decide. I have no issues’,” she says.
So Peter messaged friends and family introducing them to baby Brooke Lawford. They also shared the good news on social media and received congratulation messages.
But three days later Zara started having doubts. Her daughter didn’t look like a Brooke, and saying that name aloud just felt wrong.
“Every time someone said Brooke,I started cringing,” she says.
As the weeks and months passed, these feelings intensified. When Zara was out shopping, people would stop her and peer in to the buggy. They’d coo over the baby, and then ask the inevitable ‘What’s her name?’.
“I would say ‘Brooke’… and then I would say ‘But I really wanted to call her Annabelle or Charlotte’. And people would say, ‘Oh they are lovely names’.”
“It became a big thing, and just built and built.”
Zara says the final straw came when her two older children James and Olivia started referring to the new baby as ‘Brookie Wookie’.
“I thought, ‘I am out. That is it. I am done.’”
She text her husband saying they needed to have a serious chat. When he got home that evening she explained why she wanted to change the name.
He was understanding and supported her decision. Telling people you have changed your child’s name can be awkward, so Zara decided to deal with it head on and announce it on Instagram — much like the Jenner-Scotts.
“The next day I put a screenshot of my daughter up on Instagram. I crossed out the name Brooke and wrote ‘Annabelle’.”
Some people were surprised by the Instagram post but Zara is glad she posted it. “You may as well own it. And the relief after I did it. It was the best thing I ever did. Brookie-Wookie was going to stick in the playground and I couldn’t do it,” she says.
Changing your child’s name can be daunting for a number of reasons. Firstly, it is an admission that you got an important first decision wrong. And many are too proud or scared to admit that.
Second off, you may have to explain to people why you changed your mind, and that can invite unsolicited comments.
And then there is also the logistics of it; if you want to change your child’s name through deed poll you may have to get a solicitor involved. It’s an added expense and it takes time.
But Zara decided to go down an alternative route; she added Annabelle as a ‘forename’, and made Brooke her daughter’s middle name. You just need to fill in a form and pay a small fee (less then €20). They were issued a new birth cert with her name Annabelle Brooke.
While Zara received some ribbing about changing her daughter’s name she says it was the best decision she ever made. She would advise any parents with naming remorse to follow suit.
“If you are sure it’s not right you will regret it for the rest of your life,” she says. “I had a lot of people tell me they thought I was brave, they wanted to change their kid’s name but didn’t.
“Four months of communicating one name is nothing compared to a lifetime [of the wrong name]. I got slagged but because I knew I was now making the right decision it was water off a duck’s back.”
According to Jennifer Moss, co-host of the Baby Names Podcast, the best way to avoid making a decision you will later regret is to road test it. Say the name out loud, and in public to make sure it sits well with you.
“Experience the name from the perspective of the child,” she told the Irish Independent. “Test it at the coffee shop. How would you feel if it was your name? If it makes you uncomfortable to go out in public and say your name was Wolf, for example, don’t do it for your child.”
She also recommends selecting a name your child can grow into. “Don’t make it too ‘cutesy’ or diminutive. Remember, you’re not just naming a baby, you’re also naming an adult.”
Also make sure you Google it; you may regret not doing a quick search when you find out your child has the same name as a fast food joint, or terrible political figure, or an extremely annoying TV presenter.
If you are going to change it, the younger the child the better. Act swiftly and be confident in your decision.
“Do it before the child has psychologically associated it with their identity,” Moss advises. “After that, they might perceive it as something wrong with them, not their name, and it could be hurtful.”
And don’t feel the need to conceal their original name; it’s a unique part of their life and identity and should be celebrated.
“We still have presents with Brooke’s name on them but we wouldn’t change them,” Zara says. “It’s part of the story.”